On False Starts and The Muppets

March 08th, 2014 | Leave a comment | Food, Life, TV
On False Starts and The Muppets

OK, OK, so maybe The Whiner wasn’t quite ready to start blogging again last summer.

Shit happens, especially to someone as shit-prone as The Whiner.

At any rate, he’s ready to make another attempt at regular whines (please, hold your applause and don’t bother throwing things, he’s behind one of those cages that the Blues Brothers used when they performed at dives).

On to business…..

The over-commercialization of the Muppets has been sort of a sad thing to watch over the years – although totally understandable, since there’s so much money out there for iconic performers and characters ready to sell their souls.

There comes a time, though, when things just go too far. This abomination assailed The Whiner’s senses last night:

Now,The Whiner has been drinking Lipton Tea for decades. The Whiner will also freely admit that just about anything with Animal in it makes him laugh. And it’s nice to see Animal finally get a starring role in something.

But it’s hard to believe that Jim Henson isn’t very, very sad over this misuse of his genius.

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ESPN and ABC

April 24th, 2011 | Leave a comment | Sports, TV
ESPN and ABC

No, I am NOT watching ESPN on ABC.

I am watching ABC on ABC.

ESPN is a cable outlet. It is NOT a program.

Branding and synergy are desirable at a corporate level. But Disney has NO idea when to stop. ESPN does not need superfluous branding.

If Disney wants to pull the trigger and make ABC a broadcast outlet for ESPN, it would be an interesting gamble. But if that’s the plan, do it. Don’t bother with the moronic “ESPN on ABC” crap. It’s not only stupid, it’s disrespectful to the ONLY division that kept ABC afloat for decades, ABC Sports.

(Should I still be looking for stuff on the “Go Network?” How did that purchase and branding exercise work out for you?)

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It’s NOT Beantown.

April 24th, 2011 | Leave a comment | Sports, TV
It’s NOT Beantown.

The Whiner doesn’t expect people to know the vagaries of regions other than their own. He doesn’t even expect sports announcers who zip in and out of a city in 24 hours or less to be expert on the areas they visit briefly.

However.

Sports announcers have been broadcasting games in Boston for many, many decades. Their bosses have been assigning sports announcers to broadcast in Boston for many, many decades. Their bosses have also been assigning in-house announcers to do promos for games played in Boston for many, many decades.

It is not too much to ask that somewhere in that collection of experience, at least one person knows that the only people who call Boston “Beantown” – are outsiders who sound moronic when they use the term. Especially when they use it on the air.

Undoubtedly, the same is true for cliches used to describe other cities; the Whiner guesses that no one who is a born-and-bred New Yorker calls New York “The Apple” and that no self-respecting Chicagoan calls his city “Chi-town.” But he knows that the only people who tell us that “TOMORROW, THE SERIES RETURNS TO BEANTOWN!” are the ones who haven’t been told that they sound like idiots when they say it.

Luckily, The Whiner is on the case. I’m telling you. Stop it.

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It’s a game, not an artistic challenge.

April 06th, 2011 | Leave a comment | Sports, TV
It’s a game, not an artistic challenge.

To: TV sports producers and directors

From: The Whiner

Re: Doing Your Job

Stop with the artistic camera angles and positioning already. We just want to watch the game.

We don’t want to watch basketball from a camera suspended over the hoop. If you were at a game and someone said “Hey – I’ll trade you my baseline seats, for your seats at halfcourt” you’d tell him to get lost. So why the F do you think we want to watch from your baseline camera? (The same goes for the Fox NFL kickoff coverage from the end zone camera.)

You’re producing coverage of a TV sports event – not putting together an entry for the Cannes Film Festival. Knock it off.

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About FineWhine.com

The Whiner is finally going public, after decades of annoying, aggravating and trying the patience of friends and family. The Whiner’s background is in media, business and the internet, so his Whines often focus on stupid or incomprehensible events in those areas. However, they also focus on the incredible incompetence and obliviousness he encounters in his everyday life.

You may encounter the same level of daily frustration as the Whiner does. However, he doubts it.

In real life, The Whiner does have a name, an MBA, and a consulting business specializing in common sense solutions to media and internet problems. Reach him via email – or join him on Facebook or Twitter.

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