It’s a game, not an artistic challenge.

April 06th, 2011 | Comments Off on It’s a game, not an artistic challenge. | Sports, TV
It’s a game, not an artistic challenge.

To: TV sports producers and directors

From: The Whiner

Re: Doing Your Job

Stop with the artistic camera angles and positioning already. We just want to watch the game.

We don’t want to watch basketball from a camera suspended over the hoop. If you were at a game and someone said “Hey – I’ll trade you my baseline seats, for your seats at halfcourt” you’d tell him to get lost. So why the F do you think we want to watch from your baseline camera? (The same goes for the Fox NFL kickoff coverage from the end zone camera.)

You’re producing coverage of a TV sports event – not putting together an entry for the Cannes Film Festival. Knock it off.

Use our automated system — please!

April 04th, 2011 | Comments Off on Use our automated system — please! | Retail Stores
Use our automated system — please!

When Henny Youngman used to say stuff like that, people would laugh – realizing that it was a joke.
Now, they just follow instructions without question, and end up suffering the consequences.

Today’s specifics? The automated refill system at my local Rite Aid Pharmacy (although I’m sure the same thing happens at almost every other pharmacy in America in 2011).

Start of the month – time to call in the prescriptions.
10 am. My wife, like a good do-bee, “presses ‘1’ for the automated refill system.” Entering each of her prescriptions takes forever.
2pm. The Whiner ignores the automated refill system, “presses ‘3’ to speak with someone in the pharmacy,” ignores their exaggerated groan when he tells them “I have six prescriptions to refill,” and is done in less than a minute.
3:30pm The Whiner arrives at Rite Aid.
Guess whose prescriptions are ready for pickup – and whose are still waiting to be filled?

Has anyone ever found an automated system that saves the customer time?
Didn’t think so.


April 01st, 2011 | Comments Off on GET A BIGGER CAR! | Life

I’ll christen this blog with a small story about big cars – which may explain a little about The Whiner – and about Fine Whine.

I’ve lived in Southern California for the last 10 years. And two things became quickly apparent.
1. Most parking lots are too small – and most parking spaces in those lots are tiny. (That’s because land here is so valuable.)
2. Most cars here are big – way too big for those tiny parking spaces. (Hummers and Range Rovers used to be a major part of the mix; these days, it’s mostly mini-vans and SUVs, ranging from big to enormous and usually occupied by one person.)

At first, it was somewhat amusing to watch people try to maneuver their cars in the small lots, and park their cars in the tiny spaces. Usually, it just took them forever. Occasionally, it led to accidents.
Very quickly, though, sharing parking lots with these people became a nuisance. Then, it became really annoying. Finally, it became a nightmare.
If you’re a typically laid-back, native Southern Californian, you take stuff like this in stride.
But if you’re from an East Coast city? Not a chance. It’ll drive you nuts.
And depending on the day, daily experiences like this can turn The Whiner’s state of mind from frustrated — to angry — to almost homicidal.

It used to be enough to call out to the flummoxed drivers, “Hey! Get a bigger car!” Not anymore.
I needed a more expressive outlet for my reactions. Thus was born Fine Whine.
I hope you enjoy it.

(I was tempted to call this blog “Get A Bigger Car!” but I figured this explanation would take up WAY too much space in the sidebar.)


The Whiner is finally going public, after decades of annoying, aggravating and trying the patience of friends and family. The Whiner’s background is in media, business and the internet, so his Whines often focus on stupid or incomprehensible events in those areas. However, they also focus on the incredible incompetence and obliviousness he encounters in his everyday life.

You may encounter the same level of daily frustration as the Whiner does. However, he doubts it.

In real life, The Whiner does have a name, an MBA, and a consulting business specializing in common sense solutions to media and internet problems. Reach him via email – or join him on Facebook or Twitter.


This Will Be Filled (eventually)

What, you think I have nothing better to do than fill every little space the designer put onto the blog? Don't worry, I'll get around to it. And if I don't? I doubt it will matter very much to you or anyone else. So stop reading the sidebar already and go read the posts.

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